Rules of the Game
Tear that page out of your books right now.
Rip that page out, boys.
I want to hear the sound of ripping. (Robin Williams,The Dead Poets Society.)
What do rules mean to you ?
Are you someone who likes to break rules or do you like them because they make things clear for you?
In Peter Weir’s film, Dead Poets’ Society, Robin Williams, as the English teacher, wanted his students to be 'brave thinkers and thinking braves' and to say no rules that they hadn't really thought about.
This article is about thinking about rules and rule books.
Who's Rules
If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.
(Katharine Hepburn)
What kinds of rules do you live your life by?
Lots of rules that shape us and make us are not our rules but come from things around us. Sometimes we believe these things and sometimes we think 'no, that's not a rule that I can agree with.'.
Rules for many, are there to be broken. For others, they are the means by which we get justice. The DDA is a set of rules that helps us get our rights with backing from the law.
Why when we have some rules to give us rights are disabled people still not leading?
Is it because society thinks that we're no good? What do we do about this? Push bricks through windows or show people that we can lead, but by doing things differently?
Re-writing Rules
‘I was always told, like other children not to use my fork as a shovel with which to pick up peas. I threw that one out long ago!’ (Adrian Gilpin, Chairman, IHD)
Does shovelling your peas make you a bad person? Some of life's dos and don’ts don't work very well for us.
Coaching is about supporting people we work with to explore their rule book and question the beliefs behind the rules.
This doesn’t mean having to change who you are, but it does mean thinking about whether the rules in your life work for you and making new ones that work better for you.
Bending our Rules
Andy Serkis, a non - disabled actor, lost two stone and wore a calipher to play Ian Dury on the big screen.
Does this break our rules about the rights of disabled actors rights to play disabled people? Or was it just good to see Ian Dury in the spotlight again and to remember what a great disabled musician he was.
You can read a great review of the film and people’s reaction to his portrayal at Disability Arts Online here.
Playing by the Rules
The nature of being small and a bit wonky means i gotta get big in other ways.
If i cant be seen - I sing loud, If i cant reach - I climb. If i cant keep up - I set the pace.
(Tom Mauger, Babyhead)
Dury wasn’t particularly ‘nice’ as many of those close to him can testify. Channel 4 ‘s Cast Offs, didn’t have a lot of nice in it either but that's good.
Programmes like Cast Offs – change how disabled people are seen and that's good.
We are not broken matchstick people we are real. Tom Mauger, the lead singer of Babyhead has never let the label disabled rule him out.
Be Seen and Shine!
So what new rules are you going to write for yourself?
Whatever you write, make sure that they are rules that help you to shine and be the best you can be for people to see.
You will then have a better chance of being in control of your leadership journey however different that might be!
Sarah Pickthall, Sync Coaching
